Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Barack, Hillary, the Professor and Mary Ann...

Barack Obama scored another win over Hillary Clinton in Mississippi, 59% to 41%. The Obamarator also captured the majority of the Texas delegates, despite Sen. Clinton’s win of the popular vote.

Have you noticed how the print and web-media have taken to subtly piling-on by publishing the most unflattering pictures of Hillary they can find?

Seems like the farther behind she falls, the worse the images become. Drudge Report had one posted this morning, with Hillary looking like the Wicked Witch of the West with a hand held mic instead of a wand in her hand…

New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer has become the butt of late night TV jokes faster than it takes a prostitute to ride the train from New York to D.C.

Lisa Landry notes that "It's just mind-blowing that he spent $4,300 on a hooker," which “just shows how high the cost of living is in New York. That same hooker would cost $50 in Newark."

David Letterman: “They're talking about impeaching Eliot Spitzer if he doesn't step down, and I'm thinking, 'Whoa, a Democrat being impeached for extramarital sex. Well, happy days are here again!"

And another generation of pre-teens is getting an instant, impromptu round of sex-education.

Letterman also noted the great weather in New York yesterday, and said, "it's so sunny and bright outside that earlier today, Eliot Spitzer came out of a brothel squinting."

For the second day in a row, Spitzer was the topic of Letterman's Top- 10 list.
This time, it was "messages left on Eliot Spitzer's answering machine."

No. 1: "It's Arnold Schwarzenegger. Thanks. I'm no longer America's creepiest governor."

Jay Leno says the real irony is this story is that “the hooker said that Spitzer was done in a New York minute."

Politics is the only profession where the wife of a man caught with a prostitute has to stand by his side, Leno said. "If this guy was a plumber ... he would have his wife's SUV tire tracks over his head," he said.

Or, if he were married to a dentist in Houston.
She'd have chased him all over the parking lot in her SUV.

While we're airing soiled bloomers...
Mary Ann's been busted on Mary Jane charges:
Dawn Wells, who played Mary Ann on "Gilligan's Island," is serving six months' unsupervised probation after allegedly being caught with marijuana in her car.

Unsupervised probation--isn't that where they’ve put her on an island…?

Wells was sentenced in February to five days in jail, fined, and placed on probation after pleading guilty to one count of reckless driving. I wonder if Thurston Howell bailed her out?

Because she copped to the reckless driving charge, the three misdemeanor counts against here were dropped-- driving under the influence, possession of drug paraphernalia and possession of a controlled substance.

Wells was arrested as she was driving home from a surprise 69th birthday party that was held for her. Must've been some party favors...

She was pulled-over after a sheriff’s deputy noticed her swerve and repeatedly speed up and slow down. When asked about a marijuana smell in the car, Wells said she'd just given a ride to three hitchhikers, and dropped them off when they began smoking something. (A three-hiker tour…)

How many 69-year old women pick up hitchhikers these days?
The deputy found half-smoked joints and two small cases used to store marijuana.
Wells also failed a sobriety test. Professor? Gilligan?

Wells' lawyer said she was swerving on the road because she was trying to find the heater controls in her new car.
It’s a Buick Minnow.

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